1. Define your core values, what is important to you, and how you can act on that. Take a few moments or heck a few days and feel out and meditate on what is truly important to you, not just in the hype of the moment when you see someone doing something you too would like to do but, when you close your eyes what holds the greatest value for you. Is it family? Than ask yourself are you acting in a way that values family. Is it your relationship with your partner or your children, for you to be a good parent? Is it your social status and your job? Nothing is bad, just what is important to you?
2. What do you need to do, incorporate into your life or let go of to help add more value and action to you being you? For me, I know there are things I need to let go of and allow others to step up and do in order for me to truly be myself and follow my path, that me holding on is probably inhibiting those around me from reaching their potential and to be themselves as well. For me I know there are things I should be doing to help create balance in my life and allow me to accentuate the true me, but bad habits and ruts allow me to fall. Me being me is where I do what I need to do not based on others but based on me. And when I follow that honestly and truthfully, it is not selfish, but usually the opposite, it helps pave the way for others to be themselves in a non-harming and less self-absorbed way. Remember old habits and mindsets die hard.
3. Just say what you need to say. Not saying what you think or what you need to share is in the end going to eat you alive and also strain the relationships of those involved. Don’t think so? If I don’t share what is on my heart in a loving and honest way (being a forklift) then not only am I going to get eaten alive inside but all those involved are left in the dark and are too unable to change or see something differently which just might allow them to be a bit more true and authentic too.
4. Stop watching so much of others’ lives through social media. So much of what we see in today’s world is edited, cut and copied to draw the best crowd. And most of the time it leaves us feeling like how we are right now is just not good enough. Now don’t get me wrong seeing others work hard and achieve is very motivating, but much of what we expose ourselves to and our kids to is far from that. We do not always know what is going on behind closed doors, we do not know most peoples entire stories, but rather what we hear or see based on what a third party writes, edits or snaps in a photo. Stop now and ask yourself is who you are now based on you and your desires, your morals and your core values or what you see someone else achieving? What you see someone else accomplishing, what you see someone else working towards.
5. Be you for a day and own it! Yep, just for a day, work to authentically be you. Make choices based on what matters to you, now some may say that is selfish, but the difference between being selfish and taking care of the self is that you are not in the business of hurting others. When a person truly honors the self and acts in a truthful way others do not get hurt, and if at first their ego is bruised well then that is for them to deal with. So just for that 24 hour period test the waters on making choices and choosing activities and creating a healthy language that best serves you as a person.
Just because someone said you can’t do that, or you see someone achieving something a certain way does not mean that is the only way; it does not mean that you have to mimic those footsteps. One thing I am learning right now in my own life is how to not worry so much about how people will react to my choices, and how to honor my own inner desires and life calling, and knowing that when I do this, those around me will actually be more able to follow their own paths, desires and dreams. Because when you do you, others will be able to do the same.
So go out and make your own mold, be your own person, create your own beat and your own drum to play on. There are probably many people out there doing something similar to what you desire or are trying to achieve, but there is only one person equipped for the job of your destiny and that person is you!