So when I look at how to get out of a funk, or to make a change and grow, I often start out by looking at what I am avoiding. As a yoga teacher if I feel stuck on my mat teaching, my classes feels dull or less than abundant, I then observe what poses I am avoiding, where I feel like I am simply repeating myself and how can I spruce that area up to make it more abundant. In my own personal life I have been very conscious as to how I react,to really just observe myself and my surroundings, trying not to react so quickly and to try to see what is really going on. And what I continually realize is, that much of what I observe is, one, other people are just dealing with life the only way they know how, and two, as an observer I have an opportunity to learn from it. For a very long time my life was consumed with other people doing things (especially the hard stuff) for me, being passive aggressive,having a pitty party, stressing over things people said, did and what I thought people were saying or doing all they way down to why someone didn’t come to my yoga class Wednesday night or why they stopped coming all together; I’d think it must be because I don’t teach a particular style or that they like someone else better (and if that is true, then they need your class more than you think). And even if you are not a yoga teacher we do this to ourselves all the time, “why didn’t she call me back when she said she would” or “I know they didn’t invite me on purpose”. To put it frankly, like the world revolves around you. Now the old me would be offended by that statement, but I tell myself this often to remind me that not everything is going to go my way, not everything is directed at me and that if I allow it,everything can be a learning opportunity to grow.
Yoga teaches me over and over again that it’s not about us and when it is our only requirement is that we take it and move forward from it. I truly believe that nothing is really bad in life but rather super tough lessons to learn, that deep desire to grow may in fact come in the form of someone crossing over or you losing your house. I lost my daughter and she has given me so many amazing gifts through her short life than I think she could have any other way. So when I look at my own life and observe myself, my actions and reactions and the people around me I am then able to start to make change.
- Realize that life is what I make it. I can sit in shit or clean it up, that is truly up to me.
- I can take criticism as an opportunity to be better and grow or to shrivel up and fade away.
- Not everyone is going to like you, agree with you and see your point of view, but that doesn’t mean you should change who you are because the new trend is skinny jeans and you like boot cut, or everyone seems to like power yoga and you teach Hatha. I trust and believe that as a teacher I am here to offer and learn as well, and whomever I meet is meant to be. This goes for my personal and professional life.
- Learn to say “no”. Chant it in front of your mirror if you have to. We are a people pleasing society and even when we say “yes”we then have the attitude of no, which is even worse than saying no in the first place. I have learned if you respect yourself and your life, than others will too.
- Growth demands self reflection and times of trial. Ever wonder why when life is going really good and you start to forget where you have been and how hard you have worked and all the tools you have, to only then fall again, or feel stuck? No coincidence there; life is not simply an uphill battle, it’s a constant up and down, hills and valleys, and I truly feel that is necessary to then allow us to keep at life and continually step up our game and be someone. Now I’m not talking famous, but an asset to life.
- In the end all you can control is your own being.All you can do is lead by example. I am guilty that I was that person that didn’t want to quite commit all the way, but at some point for me, I realized that to grow you have to plant tons of seeds, because if you have ever gardened you know that not every seed will go to harvest. And some months there will be a battle of the elements, some day’s critters will be eating the fruits of your labors and sometimes things just might not grow the way you thought they would.But then, you get those few picks that are just amazing, those few seeds that grow and expand beyond what you ever intended, or a few seeds that you thought were one thing and they turned out to be another.
To grow, yoga teaches us that we need to learn to walk our own path, and as tempting as others paths are, as “easy” as they might seem,and to you, it might very well be, but that path is not your own. Those seeds are not for you to plant, you could offer water and them to you, but you are the gardener and in life; all things grow differently and all good things come to those who wait patiently and in the mean time stay the path, no matter what life may rain down on them.
I am truly bless each day in knowing that I have an abundance of opportunity to take, it’s just how much you want it and are willing to grow a little and make change.
From my heart to yours,